I’ve been going over the ever-daunting wedding checklist provided by TheKnot.com and I’m officially anxious. There is a LOT to do. We’ve been engaged for over a year and took this whole time to just chill and enjoy the time together. which has been pretty awesome actually but now that we’re under a year I’m beginning to panic.

Next weekend, Chris and I are driving home to Buffalo for our catering tasting, cake tasting/planning, and florist. Now if all these things work out then that’s some huge checks off on the list, however what if they don’t? I’m only in Buffalo for that weekend. Who knows when I can get in next. I still have to find an officiant, music (DJ or band!?!!), wedding gifts, hair and makeup trials and appointments, accessories, hotel blocks, transportation, invitations and every other piece of wedding stationary, finish our registry … the list goes on and on.

Being the slight control freak that I am, I feel the need to be a part of this planning in every step. I probably should have done more in this past year with my research. Found the vendors I wanted to use and then just put down deposits now. I wasn’t thinking!

From now on it’s wedding time. We’ve got 301 days to go- that’s 9 months and 25 days. I know that sounds like a lot but it’s not… especially when you’re planning a wedding in a location that’s 300 miles away.

Ok I’m gonna go freak out now. But not like this chick… because she’s just crazy.

So if you know me at all or follow me on twitter, you’re probably aware that I have been laid off for the better part of a year. I was let go from my job last year during this lovely economy and struggled to find something new. Finally I have landed a new gig that promises to be challenging, fun, creative, and incredibly rewarding. I am the new Web Content Producer at ThisWeek Community Media. I’m on my second week and already my head is spinning with possibilities and new information! I love what I’m learning and all the people I work with. This job is exactly what I needed and have been hoping for. I’m so excited to do the things I love everyday as a career.

I also just turned 25 on February 3rd. I’ve heard turning 25 scares a lot of people but this was a birthday I was ready to embrace. It was a quiet and contemplative day and I tried to reflect on what I learned in the last year. This has been a year of exciting events as well as complicated challenges. But overall it was a year of growth in all areas of my life and I am extremely grateful for it. I have wonderful people in my life and overall I am the happiest I’ve ever been. My mind has been opened to possibilities and opportunities that I never thought possible both personally and professionally. I’ve made some great new friends and have been overwhelmed by the community support and encouragement I’ve received from people I’ve never even met. (Twitter rocks!) I’ve gotten rid of some toxic friends and improved my other relationships with those amazing, one of a kind type friends. (Marissa and Miranda- I’m talking about you!) I also feel that my relationship with my sister has grown stronger over the last year and I’m so lucky to have her there for me. But most of all I’m so excited to marry my best friend and love of my life. Chris impresses, amazes, and infatuates me every day and I truly can’t believe I will get to spend the rest of my life with him.

Not to mention that having this new job also makes wedding planning a little easier considering I will actually be able to contribute to our budget. I feel strongly that all couples should contribute something to their wedding budget and I was worried that I might not have been able to. Planning a wedding is really stressful and this new job actually takes some of that stress off of me. (Yeah- a job that takes stress away- how cool is that?)

I wanted to take a little time as well to thank you. I have a wonderful loyal readership and the people who send me emails and ask questions and tweet me are some of the most genuine, awesome people I’ve meet over the last year. Especially you Columbus peeps and the people who helped encourage me to never give up over this tough year. I have found support in people I’ve never met (and some I have briefly) and yet you have been so kind and helpful to me. When I announced I’d finally landed this new job, the flood of congratulations and well wishes I received was overwhelming. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it.

Seriously- thank you.

So I have spoken of my love for anemones as wedding flowers. I love the white ones with large black centers. I think they are totally elegant and striking. However, being that my wedding is in Buffalo, NY, we have a problem with anemones. Though everything I’ve read says that anemones are in season November-April (perfect for my January 1 date) apparently this isn’t always the case depending on your location.

Now everything can be done for a price… so if I wanted to spend a small fortune to have white anemones grown specifically for me in Holland and then shipped to Buffalo… well then I could probably have my anemones. Sadly- I do not have a small fortune to spend. When using only one kind of flower, you also run the risk of something bad happening to the batch and then you’re stuck with no alternatives. It’s a risk that I don’t think I’m willing to take.

This is why I’m very happy I have a back up flower choice. It’s called a glamelia. I found it while reading about celebrity weddings and learned that Katherine Heigl had glamelias for her flowers. A glamelia isn’t actually a type of flower- it’s more of a technique. You start with one flower such as a rose and then you take individual petals and slowly sew them together build them around the original flower. You eventually get the effect of one huge single flower which looks something that looks like this-

Stunning, no? I’m thinking of doing them all white with touches of hopefully black petals randomly placed throughout the large flower. For my bridesmaids, they would just get an all white smaller version. I love things that are just slightly off the beaten path. Something that not everyone has seen before. This huge flower could be the wow that I’ve been looking for.

Depending on the type of flower you start out with, you’ll need one with pretty sturdy, meaty petals, but this can be relatively inexpensive because the florist doesn’t need thousands of flowers. I’ve gotten quotes for $60-100 per bouquet. There are a lot of factors that can go into pricing such as type of flower and size of the glamelia, etc. So call your local florist for an estimate. I also recommend bringing pictures.

Nothing can end engagement bliss quite like discussing the wedding budget. Pretty much the only time Chris and I ever get angry with one another is when discussing where the wedding funds will be going. As my Twitter friend @mirnygirly so wisely pointed out “It’s only a problem if you don’t have enough.” And who really has “enough” cash these days? In this economy stretching your money is a talent and a necessity. But even pinching those pennies as small as you can still might not get you as much as you hoped.

Be careful not to let the budget overwhelm you. If you’re like me, you’re probably doing most of the planning yourself while only bugging the groom when his opinion is necessary. Try to sit down every few weeks and show your groom what you are doing. Show him where your funds are going. This way he can see where you’re cutting costs and together you can identify the areas where you want to scrimp or splurge. Make sure there is plenty of compromise and that your vision for your day is in alignment and that both of you are being realistic about the cost of everything and what you can actually spend.

When either of you starts to feel a minor heart attack coming on over costs, put down your computer and step away from your number crunching. Go do something fun together that takes your mind off of planning. Come back to it with clear minds in a day or so and decide what can be done then. You won’t get anywhere yelling at each other and you won’t be open to hearing what the other person has to say. Take a step back and make sure the wedding budget isn’t slowly ruining your relationship one deposit at a time.

Your day will be beautiful because you’re celebrating your commitment and love to one another and that’s the same whether you spend $10,000 or $100,000. When you think of it that way, you’ll start to realize how silly you’ve been over chair covers or soup vs. salad. You can also rest assured that you won’t have to file for bankruptcy (or divorce) the day after you return from your honeymoon.

Photo Courtesy of WeddingSource.com

I was so excited for my Mom to get here on Friday with my wedding dress. (No, not the Vera sadly.) It had been at my parent’s house in Buffalo for 2 weeks and I wouldn’t let my mom open the box until she was with me. Finally, I undid the tape and slowly lifted the beautiful fabric out of the many layers of plastic and wrapping. I held the gown up and looked at it. It was beautiful but something wasn’t right. I chalked it up to getting smooshed in a box for 2 weeks and convinced myself that all it needed was a good steaming and fluffing. I know I love my dress but I’ve been battling wedding dress second guessings for awhile… so I decided to put it on to show my Mom and also stifle my “something wrong” feeling.
Sadly, this stifled nothing… it merely confirmed my bad feelings. The dress didn’t fit. It was so tight in the bust I could barely breathe but so large in the hip that it was laying all wrong. Then I started to notice the poor construction all over the place. The dress wasn’t laying right not just because it was too big, but the top layer was sewn to the inside lining in random places all over. The bust line, which was one of the major selling points of the dress, was also completely messed up! The manufacturer actually sewed down parts that were supposed to be sticking up. My beautiful wedding dress was a total and complete disaster. It was so poorly made that it barely resembled the sample dress I tried on at the store back in April, that gave me happy visions of not just walking, but skipping down the aisle.

Insert mini breakdown here.

It’s things like this that make me want to just run away and elope. The good news is that the store is trying to help me. Throughout this whole process, they have been incredibly helpful and hopefully they can do something to remedy this situation. Due to the construction issues alone, they are trying to get the manufacturer to make me an entirely new dress. They are also trying to get it made in the next size up to accommodate my bust. I have not been given confirmation yet if this will all be possible… I’m waiting anxiously.

Lesson Learned: It’s never too early to buy your dress. I would advise all brides to start looking at dresses and styles immediately after getting engaged. Then as soon as you pick your date and venue, go buy your dress. This way you know everything will tie together in style AND assures that there’s plenty of time to fix any problems that might arise. I’ve heard much worse stories than mine where bridal salons go out of business, tailors hold dresses hostage, dresses getting destroyed, you name it. This way you take every precaution that you don’t end up dress-less on your big day.
Or worse…