No- it is absolutely not what you are thinking. However…

Yours truly, Ms.Catalysta,  is the proud owner of a labradoodle!!!!!!! That’s right, I finally got the second dog I’ve been wanting forever! The story… 

Last week, Boyfriend tells me he has some secret Christmas errands to run after work and that he wouldn’t be home until late. I decided to let it go and not bug him about it as I normally would and try to figure it all out. So I’m sitting on the couch wasting time on Facebook and Google and then I hear Boyfriend’s car pulling into the garage. The knob turns and stops for a second- then the door opens slowly. Boyfriend pops his head and turns to show me what he’s got grasped in his arms. A brown fuzz ball. My jaw dropped to the floor. 

MsCatalysta- “What the hell is that?”
Boyfriend- “It’s a dog.”
MsCatalysta- “Seriously? Like, it’s mine?”
Boyfriend- “I got him for you… for Christmas.” 
MsCatalysta- “Ok, but seriously… What is it?” 
Boyfriend- “It’s a labradoodle.”
MsCatalysta- (stunned smiling silence) 
Boyfriend- “Well do you like him?” 

Did I like him? Was he serious? I’m over the moon. Joyful. Exuberant. Blissful. I’m running out of synonyms for my happiness. I had pretty much put the entire second dog notion out of my head because Boyfriend was adamant that getting one would basically make him not want to come back to his own home at night. So he compromised. He got a 6 month old labradoodle that does not shed or smell bad and he can take running when he gets a little older. 

He’s not exact potty trained yet so now we have Peeing Dog #2. I never thought I’d see the day where Peeing Dog #1 would be considered the “good pet.” Actually she’s still the middle child because Cat will always be the best pet since he poops in a box- though in Peeing Dog #1’s defense- I did just spend an entire Sunday Windex-ing and Febreze-ing a fake Christmas tree because when Cat recently had a UTI, he decided to make our poor Christmas tree his toilet for a day. 

And yet, none of this matters. I love my animals so much and I’m so happy I could burst. Mornings are ridiculous trying to feed 2 dogs and wrestle a cat away from the food bowls. I worry all day that Peeing Dog #2 has been in his crate too long and needs to go outside. I clean pee off the floor somewhere on a daily basis. His first vet visit was ridiculously expensive and he needs to be de-wormed (I’ll spare you the nasty details…). Today he chewed his travel crate zipper rendering it useless trash, escaped and jumped over the baby gate to the basement where Peeing Dog #1 is housed for the day. (They are already fast friends.) But despite the messiness and honestly pain in the ass- none of these things bother me. I actually love it! AND Boyfriend knew how badly I wanted a second dog and he did it just for me. This is the best present I could have ever gotten. 

I have a feeling that this is going to be the best holiday season ever. And I wish you all the same.

Have you received any early presents or bought anything good for someone you care about? 

Happy belated Thanksgiving everyone! Hope yours was filled with lots of turkey and gravy! Boyfriend and I decided not to travel and instead spend the lovely 4 blissful days of vacation in the (not-so-new-anymore) house! I cooked my very first Thanksgiving dinner, which in my opinion was fantastic, and had a quiet, lovely, relaxing break. It was great to take the time to actually be together instead of constantly busy with regular everyday life. 

Recently, Boyfriend and I have had some pretty intense conversations about how we have become boring and we don’t like it. Currently as young/mid twenty somethings, we are stuck in a very odd place. We aren’t old enough for the family and the kids, but we aren’t young enough for the college bar scene. We own a house and are a stable couple with full time jobs. When you work for 9 hours and get home, you have about enough time to take care of a peeing dog, feed yourself, and maybe catch something on TV before passing out. It’s tough to find interesting things to do that you both enjoy and fun enough that you are actually motivated to do them after a long work day. 

So this break we went out on a couple dates. It was great. We had great conversation and a lot of fun people watching. We went to an upscale martini bar and then to see the new James Bond movie. Another night we went out in our new town to a local bar where there was some country band playing and crazy tapered jeans wearing locals that lifted up their shirts showing off their tramp stamps- for reasons that are really beyond me, but I can only guess was to hopefully score a chance at going home with one of the hillbilly band members. Then we did some stuff on our own as well. I painted another hallway, and did some Christmas shopping for him and he worked on the motorcycle and went running. 

So I know you’re all probably riveted by my extremely interesting holiday and all but there is a point to my babbling. When you’re feeling like you’re stuck in a rut and you need some excitement- what do you do? Where do you go? What kinds of activities do you do with your significant others other than your everyday routines? Groups, clubs, sports? We need some extra suggestions here! 

(picture is from apple picking in October!) 

I have BIG plans for this Halloween. Sadly- it’s not handing out candy to the snot nosed children that are going to run home and gorge themselves in front of their video games or watch the 12 year old girls of America flush their morals down the toilet have oodles fun as they run around dressed as slut-tastic tasteful cops, angels, cats, nurses, or naughty school girls. I won’t be perusing the neighborhoods for the pedophiles with their lights out and “NO CANDY” signs that Ohio is forcing them to put up. I’m forgoing the chili cook off and costume contest at work (in which normally I would not only be participating enthusiastically but most likely helping organize as well). I’m not going to pass out in a sugar coma with Boyfriend in mass hoards of chocolate wrappers that didn’t get make it into the hands of the aforementioned slutty 12 year olds…

Oh no… this year I’m meeting my inspiration. This year I’m going to see the person whose songs drag me up from some of my darkest days. I’m driving to Louisville, Kentucky and going to see Idina Menzel. Yes, Idina Menzel. She played the original Elphaba in the Broadway production of Wicked for which she won a Tony. She also received a Tony nomination for her original role Maureen in Rent. (Oh and did I mention she’s married to Taye Diggs? The gorgeous piece of man candy that helped Stella get her groove back? The hot doctor on Private Practice…) Whoops- ok just snapped out of lengthy involved daydream-back on track. I’m an admitted musical nerd so Idina’s extensive and impressive resume is just one of the many things that make me call her my idol. I cried when she announced she was leaving her role as Elphaba before I would get to see it.

I love everything about the theatre. I remember my parents taking me to shows and I would get all dressed up and wait for the curtain to rise and the music to take over. It was the best escape I had- pretend I was somewhere else, someone else. I was practically raised on a stage and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. My parents would come home from somewhere and catch me singing at the top of my lungs to The Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables and Cats to my pretend audience who of course thought my performance was positively inspired. I begged my mother to let me audition for shows. I forced her to drive me to rehearsal after rehearsal- on top of private oboe lessons, gymnastics, and cheerleading practice. Some of my friends and family might say I have a flair for the dramatic but I have no idea what they are talking about… 

I’m so excited. I have my outfit picked out, I have my directions printed, camera charged, and tickets inhand. After the concert, I’m going to stand outside of that stage door like a little kid waiting for Santa mature adult and beg for an autograph and maybe a picture. I bought a pumpkin to give to her because I want her attention like a fat kid wants cake it’s Halloween and I even have a witch hat to wear for more attention to be festive. Sister thinks I’m nuts. Can’t say I blame her. She said, “Try not beg Idina to take you to Broadway and make you a star. Maintain your dignity.” I told her I’d do my best. 

I’ve waited 5 years to see Idina Menzel in person and tomorrow- my favorite holiday- I will finally see her in person! So if I break into a chorus of “Defying Gravity,” start hyperventilating, and stalk Idina’s tour bus to her hotel- could you really blame me? Sorry Sister… dignity is overrated.

This is the most honest I’ve ever been with myself.

I am a 23 year old idealist masked as a cynic. I hide behind my sarcastic exterior in hopes to be pleasantly surprised by the many untrustworthy, mean-spirited, nasty environment around me. I do my best to surround myself with people and things that make me happy, but no matter where I go there are always people and places who’s apparent goal in life is to try and be a succubus on all that strive for happiness. I choose to normally hide my idealism because I’m afraid of being disappointed and hurt. 

I believe that people should have respect for others- respect for their beliefs, for their life, and for their choices- so long as it doesn’t hinder people’s quest for truth, love, or freedom.

I give people the benefit of the doubt. 

I believe the best in people. 

I do my best to forgive.

I care entirely too much about what people think.

I have a good poker face and play the role of a sharp-tongued, spit-fire to save face when I’m hurt. 

I cry easily.

I think that love is the greatest feeling you could hope for. 

I always want to learn because you can’t know it all- you can only think you know it all. 

I believe that you should always tell the truth so you never have to remember what you told different people, but sometimes it’s better to not know the truth. 

I try to trust myself but often don’t listen to my own intuition and I regret it.

I get discouraged when there is something I can’t accomplish. 

I want to prove people wrong when they doubt me, but mostly it forces me to give up trying. 

I need to know that love and passion can coexist for a lifetime. 

I look for beauty.

I can be extremely negative but sometimes it’s just so people can show me the silver lining.

I find that giving is better than getting. 

I strive for happiness.

I realize this is lofty. I realize the world is not perfect and nothing will always fall into place. But wouldn’t it be nice if it did? I would love to wake up to a bountiful economy where poverty, homelessness, hunger, and pain were no longer an issue. Sometimes I don’t sleep at night because I can’t stop thinking about how sad some of my friends are. I get sick to my stomach when I think about innocent animals that are abused and mistreated.

I am not a martyr. I hope that what I say isn’t making me sound like I’m trying to be one. Maybe that’s why I hide behind cynicism. Because at least cynicism can be funny. Sarcasm can be an excellent rock to hide behind and to help protect the carefully armored shell you helped create for 20+ years. I have a delicate shell and I often incidentally help others in shattering it. But I am an idealist. I want the best for all people and I want them to define what “best” means to them. But it’s so hard to be honest about my Utopian principles when the world is so fucked up that by just turning on any media source in the morning can cause outrage and tears and ruin your entire day. Maybe this is why we turn to an anti-anxiety medication or anti-depressant- to help us cope with the terrible things we hear and see and experience. As much as I wish everything was sunshine and puppies and rainbows, I do understand that they are not and never will be. But for this night that I sit and type this and possibly subject myself and my thin little shell to the sledgehammer of reality… I don’t care. 

Tonight, this is my Idealist Manifesto.

Go ahead and call me jaded. Go ahead and burst my unrealistic bubble. Or tell me- what do you secretly believe in? What is your ideal that you keep no matter how many times you get knocked down? What do you hope for? 

And don’t worry. Tomorrow I’ll be back to my sarcastic self.

So it’s late August here in Columbus and as I took Peeing Dog out for potty break #2,923 of the night, I felt a little chill run up my arms. Yep, I smell fall. The temperature has gone down to 50 sometime degrees and you can smell the change in the air. I love fall, but where did my summer go? I think I spent about 3 afternoons laying out by the pool. I’m not exactly a sun goddess, but I barely remember spending any time outside.  

Long gone are the summers with meaningless jobs that you called off without caring every now and again to do something stupidly fun with your friends. The summers where you just bide your time doing nothing until the next school year starts. Every summer that Boyfriend and I have been together (6 and counting!), we have gone somewhere and done something. One summer we drove from Phoenix, AZ to Buffalo, NY. Another summer I bought us tickets back to Phoenix for Boyfriend’s graduation present to visit friends. Last summer he took me to New York City for my graduation present.  Other summers in between we went camping for long weekends. This summer there was no such trip. I’m sad because I really loved that unplanned tradition of ours. This summer was filled with weekend out of town weddings- not exactly blissful vacation material. Now that I think about it- I barely noticed that it was summer and now September is right around the corner. 

But as of today, I’m done looking back. I’m looking forward and I’m seeing FALL! I always loved the fall and starting a new year in college. Moving into the new apartment and trying to make the shit hole into some awesome place to live. (It never worked.) But it didn’t matter- it was new and therefore wonderful and perfect. This is a NEW fall! We will pay our last month of rent in my last (hopefully) crap hole apartment and finally move into our new house! (I got the official “it’s ok to call it ‘our house’ stamp of approval today.) I feel similar to how I felt when I moved into my freshman dorm going to college- completely terrified for this stage of my life to begin but excited about new changes and challenges.  

Other things I love about Fall-

• Buckeye Football!!! 
• Amazing clothes and coats
• Fall TV premieres
• Puppy Season (still working on dog #2. Boyfriend fell in love with a Shmorkie- Yorkie, Shitzou mix- but told me we could only get another dog if I’m willing to trade in Peeing Dog… but at least it wasn’t a direct NO, right? I think I’m wearing him down)
• the perfect weather
• Beautiful colors all around
• Thanksgiving
• Apple Cider

 What is something you’re really looking forward to this fall?