I’ve written a couple posts about where to begin your wedding planning, but sometimes you just need a little help. Now, I’m not usually one to promote specific events, because I don’t like to point brides in a direction where they’re going to leave feeling more overwhelmed than when they started. I also don’t like bridal events very much because the vendors can get extremely pushy and that is so not my style.

That being said, I recently heard about a great event coming up here in the great city of Columbus put on by some of the best in the wedding business and I couldn’t resist telling you about it!

This bridal workshop, What To Do Before Saying I Do, promises to be filled with great information and how to’s, so you can get all the knowledge you need to jump into wedding planning full force. This is your opportunity to learn the dos and don’ts from premiere wedding vendors in the area. You can ask them whatever you like and get your questions answered. This is also a fabulous opportunity to gush with other brides (including yours truly!) about your upcoming nuptials and get some fresh and creative ideas that will set your wedding apart from a sea of tulle and beading.

The event is FREE. Yes you heard me… FREE and it promises to be fun and educational and there is no obligation whatsoever to hire any of the vendors. But you’re welcome to if you’d like what you see or hear! You’re also welcome to bring a guest with you. (See below for RSVP information.)

Where: The Loft at Smith Brothers 580 North 4th Street, Columbus, Ohio 43215
When: Sunday, February 28, 2010 from 12pm-3pm

Vendors Present Will Include:
Alice’s Piece of Cake
Bloomtastic Florist
So Inviting Designs
DK Photographic
Emilie Duncan Event Planning
T.E.A.M DJ
MJ’s Candy & Events
Cameron Mitchell

Light Hors d’oeurves will be provided by Cameron Mitchell and there will also be door prizes given away!

A reservation is required. For questions and to RSVP, email your name and if you will be bringing a guest to: rsvp@bloomtastic.com

As mentioned, I will be attending so if you decide to come, please leave me a comment or tweet me so I know to look out for you and say hello! I’d love to meet you and hear all about your plans that is, as long as you don’t mind listening to some of mine too!

A lot of people have been asking me- so how do I start planning? There’s so much to take in and where do I even start? Well here’s some sage advice from someone who’s been there, didn’t listen, and wishes she would have.

First thing is first- set your budget. This number will drive your entire wedding. Ask (politely) who can and will be able to contribute to your wedding. Will either your or your partner’s parents be able to help out or will you be funding everything on your own? Get as close to a solid number as you can from everyone who will be contributing. Once you have a set budget- don’t waver. Unless you come upon a large windfall of cash or find a long lost millionaire relative- stick with your budget. Budgets can be a nasty point of contention on your otherwise happy engagement especially if you start to get eyes for 14k gold edged place settings, Vera Wang dresses, and Rihanna as your wedding band. There are great budget calculators on WeddingWire.com and TheKnot.com where you can input your entire budget and break it out amongst all the different vendors. You can then customize them as needed. So that’s priority one- set the budget.

After you have a solid budget set- sit down with your fiance and make a list of 3 things that are the most important to the both of you on your wedding day. These are the areas where you are willing to splurge a little. For example, the must haves for Chris and me were venue, food, and photography. These were areas which were most important to us and we are willing to sacrifice in other areas to have better quality. These “deal-breakers” will help keep your budget in check but also allow for some leeway in what you feel is important and special. Make sure you and your fiance agree on your deal breakers. Maybe you each choose one and then decide on the third together. This ensures that you both are getting what’s most important to you on your wedding day.

Next decision you’ll have to make is when and where. Are you set on a specific date or a specific place? If the date of your wedding is most important then start searching for venues right away and put a deposit down as soon as you find one you love. If you’re more interested in the venue then do some research and take your time finding a great place. If you love a place that’s out of your budget, try asking out about off season dates. Friday and Sunday weddings are also a great way to save money but still keep your favorite place. Once you find a place you love, figure out the season you’d like to get married in and find what dates are available. I love our venue, so we chose a date in January, during the off season to save half the cost on the site fee.

Last big decision regards your style. Your venue can help influence this aspect of your wedding- indoor/outdoor, formal/casual, contemporary/vintage, etc. Do you have funky style or classic? Consult your fiance on this and come up with a plan about the type of affair this will be. His opinion is important and though he might not care about the tiny details like you do, he’ll probably want a small say about the style of the event.

Remember you’re getting married and compromise is going to be the newest and most frequent word used in your vocabulary. Compromise really starts with planning your wedding. Most people don’t have an endless budget so you’ll have to decide on what’s important and what’s not.

Either way, you’re getting married and that’s pretty awesome. And if all this is too much for you… just elope!

So now tell me- what are your 3 most important areas for your day?

I’ve been researching this topic quite a bit recently. It seems to be a hot button on many forums and wedding boards. So I thought it was worth a discussion here.

I polled my twitter friends and overwhemlingly the response came back that adult only receptions or weddings are a reasonable request with a few exceptions. Since this is a big and most likely expensive day, the couple is allowed to dictate a few things. This might be viewed as inconvenient or rude by others and that is something you’ll have to accept, should you decide to have an adult only reception.

You should expect to take some flack from family and friends with kids. However, if you want an adult only reception- which in my opinion is completely reasonable- here are my tips to ensure the least amount of complaints from your guests and therefore less stress for you-

• Pick an age limit- say 10 and under- and discuss with your fiance and parents that no children in that bracket will be invited. No exceptions.
• If a flower girl and/or ring bearer are in your party, consider only having them at the ceremony and not the reception. This backs up your “adult only” policy and will help your case that you are not picking and choosing specific children.
• Clearly communicate this via all wedding invites, info, etc. For example, address the invitations directly to the members of the family who are invited. You can also include the exact number of seats reserved for them on the RSVP card. I would also add a small blurb on your wedding website that says “Adult only” reception in your description. Feel free to see how I worded this request on our personal wedding website.
• Give a personal call to the guests who did not get the message from the invitation and RSVPed with their children anyway. Kindly apologize and explain that children cannot be accommodated. Feel free to throw in the phrase “due to budget” if you need a better excuse.
• Accept the fact that no matter how tactfully you ask, some people might be offended and not come. This is unfortunate but still a possibility and you have to be ready for it.
• Don’t feel guilty! Remember that your guests are not footing your bill nor will they be able to take back the actions of their children should they all of the sudden throw a tantrum in the middle of your vows, which is then captured on video for all eternity. If you want an adult only affair, stick to your guns and try not to feel guilty.
• Offer to hire a couple of babysitters at one of the wedding party hotels or suites, kind of like a temporary daycare for the evening. You can cover an up-front fee for the sitters and then the parents can pay the sitter’s hourly rate per child. This way you look helpful and thoughtful for your guests and less like the child-hating bridezilla.
• For the guests- try to be understanding of the couple’s request. It is not a personal attack against you or your children. The couple just chooses to celebrate with the people who really “get” what the day is about or maybe they truly can’t afford to accommodate everyone’s children which can amount to big numbers.

Personally, I’m having an adult only wedding. No flower girl, no ring bearer. No kids whatsoever at the ceremony or reception. And since we have many family members with babies and young children, I accept that this will probably be viewed by some as a nuisance. To them and all others who feel this way, I apologize.

Just call me child-hating bridezilla.

PS- This picture totally creeps me out-

Sorry for the brief hiatus! I have been incredibly busy starting a new freelance job where I’m working full time hours. Anyway-

The other day I came across this article on Mashable.com and I was inspired. The writer describes how his social media geekness is guiding his wedding planning with his fiance. He’s found ways to incorporate Twitter, Amazon.com, and a whole host of other social media applications to make wedding planning into a virtual snap.

Now doing everything that he mentions seems intense, unless you want your wedding theme to be “I spend entirely too much time on the internet.” However, there are a bunch of things he does mention that can make your planning a lot easier and more efficient. Some of the websites he name checks are even things I’ve mentioned before. Here are a few more of my favorites from the article-

I love Etsy for jewelry and other customized wedding details. I also love supporting these vendors who offer personalized services and they have an entire category for wedding vendors and products. I got my amazing hairpiece from there and you can find veils, invitations, jewelry, shrugs or cover-ups, purses, shoes, even wedding dresses. Seriously, check it out.

Whether you like social media or not, I highly recommend setting up a wedding website. If you’re social media savvy, try a Facebook event page or blog to help keep people updated. You can find free wedding websites at WeddingChannel.com, TheKnot.com, or WeddingWire.com. All offer free applications where you choose your theme, pages, and fill in information for your guests. I am using The Knot’s software because it was the only one I knew at the time when I set it up about a week after getting engaged even though I had nothing to write on it yet! I bought a custom domain to forward to the actual page, but other sites already offer custom domain options. Our wedding web-page is located at www.chrisandmegswedding.com. Feel free to sign our guestbook! The wedding website is also the perfectly acceptable place to tell people where you are registered since you never EVER mention that on invitations. However, you can put your URL in small print at the bottom of your invitation, indirectly pointing them to the information.

I recently joined Wedding Wire, which is my new obsession. Their budget sheet is incredibly helpful and allows you to enter the dates of all your payments that need to be made to your specific vendors. They also help show you how to break down your total budget number so you can see generally what you should be spending on each item. They also have lists of local vendors complete with reviews, websites, and ways to save your favorites so you don’t forget later. Once you’ve chosen a specific vendor you add it to your list for easy access. You can download the Wedding Wire app to your phone so your vital wedding information is always with you. Convenient much? Yeah, exactly.

My favorite advice from the Mashable article was about the wedding registry. You can use Amazon.com to create a universal registry where you can register for gifts from hundreds of places as opposed to the entire kitchen department at Bed, Bath & Beyond. MyRegistry.com is another place that does that same thing. MyRegistry is my favorite pick because you can also request cash gifts for those bigger items you might really need without looking tacky. Then apply the cash towards that new couch you want or an expensive set of cookware. (I’m currently coveting a very expensive Dyson Vacuum cleaner.) However, you also have to remember that older friends and relatives might not love or understand the shopping online thing, so having at least one traditional registry would do you good.

My own personal addition to this social media wedding frenzy is for the people who can’t make it- you can use Skype or IdoStream.com to broadcast your wedding to those out-of-towners who can’t be there on your day. They can watch everything and still feel like they are a part of your day! You can find some free applications or pay a fee for better quality.

I totally recommend reading the whole article for even more tips and sites. There’s even a website to find custom color schemes developed by designers. Which applications or sites would you consider using and why?

Finally!

I can announce our official date!! Christopher and I will be tying the knot on January 1, 2011 or 1.1.11. Neat, huh? Though we had been planning on New Year’s Eve, we fell in love with a venue in which the date was already taken. However, by having our date set in January as opposed to December- by only 1 day later- we saved significantly on our site fee. A tip I recommend to everyone. On season prices and off season prices at certain venues can make all the difference in your budget. And we got lucky in that January 1st is still a Saturday! It also works with most all of our family members, of which I will spare you of hearing all the drama.

Here is our venue! It’s called Asbury Hall and from the moment I walked in I was blown away. You can take a little 360* tour of our ground floor. Make sure to click on the buttons on the top right and see how they transform it for a wedding reception. It’s an old church owned by Ani DiFranco and was renovated to be used for receptions, concerts, and private parties. Our whole event including ceremony, cocktails and reception will be held there. Their are pews in the upper areas on the sides and that is where our guests will sit. They will look down at us as we recite our vows on the main floor in front of the stage. We will then go into our cocktail hour in the basement which has natural beautiful stone and dark wood bar. It’s everything I wanted in a venue. I will walk directly down the center of the amazing wood floors to my awaiting groom. *little squeal of excitement*

Finally having a date, after 6 months of being engaged, makes everything seem more real. At times I never thought we’d actually set a date because I’ve been so back and forth on what I wanted, but now we can move forward and really dive into planning. I have a feeling that even though 1.1.11 is still a year and a half away, it’s going to fly by and be here before we know it.

I can’t wait.